by Peter Löcke //
Monday morning. I have a routine appointment with my GP. Sitting on the regional train with a coffee-to-go in my hand, I feel like Don Quixote. Like me, the knight of the sad figure no longer knew whether he was living in a novel or in reality. The train starts moving on time. The Internet is working. I am pleasantly surprised. While surfing the news, I land directly at my faithful companion Sancho Panza. How did the squire Robert Habeck experience the last few days? Just as I have experienced them. Poetry and reality are almost indistinguishable in the best Germany of all time.
The supply in Germany is at risk. The Court of Audit settles accounts with Habeck. In response, Habeck settles accounts with the ACA. This was to be expected. Habeck then rides climate-neutral with Rosinante to the USA to tell the Americans off. Or did he travel by government plane? Not important. What was important was the unhappy message that Habeck brought with him as a gift.
"Solve the fucking problems."
Knight Robert admonishes the unimpressed host that he is lagging behind in saving the world's climate. Only Germany is on track, the rest of the planet is not. After so much reality and back in Germany, the German Minister of Economic Affairs felt that poetry in the form of visions was needed. Habeck wants to shoot Germans on the moon in the future. I find that funny, because the opposite is true in the present. In the here and now, many Germans want to shoot Habeck on the moon. Metaphorically speaking.
The net is down. I look out of the window. The train is somewhere on the prairie. It stands just like the blades of the wind turbines that I look at out of the window and which spoil the once beautiful landscape. Don Quixote had it good 400 years ago. He only had to fight windmills, not wind turbines.
After a quarter of an hour, the train starts moving again. No announcement as to what the problem was. Instead, I read an announcement from the Pope after the internet is working again. The bridge builder wants to build bridges by calling for negotiations. The timing seems unfavorable after the whole of Germany found out about the secret plan to destroy the Crimean Bridge. At the beginning of the year, the pontiff voiced the conspiracy theory that there were only two genders. Since then, the Pope has been boxing politicians and the media in chain mail. Well then. The traditional Easter marches will take place at the end of March. Then the veterans of the peace movement make up for the papal mistake and chant together:
Pershing instead of petting! Taurus instead of tits! Nuclear power no thanks, nuclear weapons yes please!
Speaking of mistakes. The hashtag Fehlerchen is making the rounds on X. From Lauterbach to Seehofer to the former head of the Chancellery, Braun, political celebrities are admitting mistakes in coronavirus policy. This backpedalling is surely just a coincidence. Now that a major crime has been dealt with between breakfast and lunch, we can finally get back to business as usual. Reappraisal is overrated. Work itself is overrated.
I finally know that thanks to Katharina Stolla. The young lady is the national spokesperson for the Green Youth. No pain, no gain! Half the work with double pay! That's how I interpreted the statements made on Markus Lanz. Maybe I just misunderstood Ms. Stolla.
"We don't want to get sick from work, my generation thinks."
That's what she really said. It would depend on a first attempt at work. That's what I thought when I looked at Katharina Stolla's CV.
The train stops again. Fortunately, it stops at my destination station and not on the prairie like before. Smartphone off, because I have my coffee on in view of the messages I have consumed. My cup of coffee to go is also empty and I urgently need a new one. I enjoy it sitting quietly in a café. From there, I can also cancel my doctor's appointment. I know myself that I'm living unhealthily and that my blood pressure is too high. Instead, I google Don Quixote to refresh my memory. What do I learn on Wikipedia about the adventures of my perceived idol?
The episodes usually end with Don Quixote being beaten up by rough opponents, but winning against the innocent with little glory as the Knight of the Sorrowful Countenance.
Then I don't want to be Don Quixote. After all, my fight is against brute adversaries and my love is for the innocent. I want to be brave and fight windmills as a knight of fortune. Nothing scares me anymore. No Lauterbach, no Habeck, no war, no virus, no German rail strike throws me out of it. Nothing can shock me anymore. So I cheerfully switch on my smartphone again to find out what else is new.
Impending coffee shortage! Massive increase in prices!
I am in shock. From now on it will be personal.
Articles identified by name do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the publisher.
English 
German 
Spanish
One Response
Whenever you think that everyone is crazy, it's time to take a look at yourself. This doesn't change the reality, as it is, quite banal, a search for truth. Getting at least close to the truth is a form of self-empowerment, you become "sovereign", writ large. The absurdity that happens around us is nothing more than background noise and shouldn't get us too worked up, because we actually have better things to do. Exchange ideas, listen, live in community, promote the common good. Utopias? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. I'm in favor of yes, but that's what we do.