You should be ashamed of yourself!

How pronounced is your sense of shame? How quickly do you blush? It happens to me quickly and far too often. There are reasons for this. 

Appearance, cultivated behavior and, above all, polite manners are important. I was taught these values. My problem? Absent-mindedness is my middle name. So there are bound to be embarrassing moments when I don't live up to the values I've been taught. An example?

A coffee stain on the T-shirt, which doesn't match the color of the trousers and the two mismatched socks anyway - that's me. Dressed like this, I met an old acquaintance in the city whose name I couldn't remember off the top of my head - that's me too. His wife's name is Inge. At least I could remember that. So, during small talk, I asked about Inge's well-being and learned that his wife had been dead for three years. How embarrassing! As reliably as these things happen to me, I am always ashamed afterwards. Just as well. What would it say about me if I wasn't embarrassed by my mistakes? What's bad is that I'm now supposed to be ashamed of things that I don't want to be ashamed of. It brings a different blush to my face. A blush of anger.

But all theory is gray. On to everyday life, like my lust for meat. Not what you think. You should be ashamed of yourself. There's currently a carnivore week at the discount store just around the corner. So let's go there. Past the veggie offers, sustainability signs and CO2 warnings, I reach the red light area of the sausage counter and order a kilogram of roast beef with a lowered voice. Can I have a little more? I nod bashfully and catch myself looking at my feet. My ecological footprint seems to be growing in real time. I quickly hide my meat sin in the shopping basket under unsuspicious products such as toilet paper and toast. And now it's time to get out, because I'm in luck. No queue at the checkout. I hastily place my purchases on the conveyor belt and ask for two plastic bags for transportation. As usual, the cashier reprimands me.

"We no longer carry them. Plastic bags are not sustainable." 

As usual, I rebuke. 

"And why are almost all products packaged in plastic?"

I pay for my shopping plus five euros for sustainable carrier bags and leave the discount store of horrors in a mixture of shame and anger. With shame of the flesh, shame of others, a lowered bank account and a simultaneously increased CO2 account. At least I'm walking. So my ecological square feet swell a little. If one or two readers use a car powered by fossil fuels to transport their shopping - you should be ashamed of yourself.

It's cold when you get home. On the one hand, this saves energy costs, and on the other, it counteracts the heating shame. A cool heat pad it does, I was recently told by ZEIT author Henrik Oerding. No, Mr. Oerding. The grain pillow alone helps my ageing back after I have just dragged my shopping home in a climate-neutral way. So the heating is on in November, because the rest of my body would just as soon be at a comfortable temperature. I compensate for my lack of heating shame with the fact that I'm renting.

One or two readers own their own four walls? You should be ashamed of yourself. Building a house, planting a tree, fathering a child? These may have been life goals in the past. Today, it is an expression of unsolidary behavior that contributes to the destruction of the planet. Possessions only make you unhappy. You should own nothing and be happy. According to WEF founder Klaus Schwab.

Shame on you, Mr. Schwabbecause I won't be ashamed of everything I should be ashamed of. And no one who has built something up through hard work, no one who can afford something through achievement, should be ashamed.

And now I take a long, hot shower. Without any shower shame. I think about the delicious roast beef that my wife is preparing. She's a bit annoyed at the moment because we now have fifty sustainable carrier bags and yet I'm going to the discount store without one the next time I go shopping. Not out of absent-mindedness. The dialog at the checkout is worth it to me. I should be ashamed of myself.