Cake battles

"The pie in the human face is one of the most important ideas of international humor." [1]

I don't share this opinion, but who am I to disagree with my unrivaled idol? The quote comes from Loriot. Objectively speaking, Loriot is of course right. People have always found it funny when person A throws a cake in person B's face. The audience then slaps their thighs with laughter and enjoys the cake-smeared loss of face of the ridiculous-looking victim.

The film industry knows this too. The US adventure comedy "The Great Race Around the World", originally titled "The Great Race" [2], took it to the extreme. The classic 1965 film featured a cake fight that lasted more than three minutes [3]. The running gag of the scene was that Tony Curtis, dressed all in white, was the only one to visually survive the cake massacre, which got out of hand, until it got him in the end. After that, the scene was over. Change of scene here too.

So is everything funny or what when it comes to cakes? Not in the political sphere. In political reality, an assassination is an assassination. Then the state security investigates and all parties with a democratic seal of approval show solidarity with the victim. 

This was recently demonstrated by the incident involving Christian Lindner [4] at an election campaign appearance in Greifswald. Hats off! The FDP politician reacted to a left-wing activist's atten-pie act with similar style to Tony Curtis. Instead of throwing himself whimpering on the floor, the leading Liberal candidate licked his fingers with relish and continued his speech nonchalantly. That's how it has to be, after all, a Lindner knows that he is on the set of a movie. The title of the movie is "The big race for the Bundestag election".

Despite all the justified indignation, the film scene in Greifswald offered several comic elements. For example, the activist unfortunately only threw a pseudo cake made of shaving foam instead of Black Forest kirsch. I would have preferred this variety. In addition, the assassin is said to belong to a left-wing youth organization and to be 34 years old. That makes me wonder at what age you switch to the adult section of the party. The greatest sense of humor, however, was shown by the bodyguards present. I am certainly not a spontaneous person. Nevertheless, I have a faster reaction time than Christian Lindner's bodyguards.

So be it. I don't want to seem insensitive. In political assassinations involving cakes, there is always a victim. You fraternize or fraternize with this victim. On the other hand, there is always a perpetrator. This perpetrator is socially ostracized and, if necessary, legally charged. That should be the law among all democrats. It's as simple as that. Isn't it?

No. It's not that simple. Sometimes the victim is declared the perpetrator and the perpetrator the victim. This is what happened in Kassel in 2016 [5, 6].

Back then, two left-wing activists from the Peng Collective attacked AfD politician Beatrix von Storch. One threw the cake, the other captured the attack on camera for posterity. Afterwards, almost all the media agreed. The scandal was not the cake throwing. The scandal was that the victim von Storch published the name of the perpetrator dressed as a clown. 

It was just an "offer of dialog for right-wing extremists". The perpetrator mockingly defended his act, for which he was celebrated by Tagesschau & Co. However, the action artist only really became famous in January 2024, when he swapped the cake for a keyboard. That's when he switched from activist to journalist. 

The name of the activist is Jean Peters. The perpetrator & cake smasher is Jean Peters, the main author of Correctiv's fantasy story about the secret meeting in Potsdam. 

Is it all funny or what? Who is the perpetrator, who is the victim? That sometimes depends on your own world view and your own sense of humor.

Besides black humor, I prefer the humor of Loriot and Jack Lemmon. Jack Lemmon was the second protagonist in the classic film "The Great Race" alongside Tony Curtis. Covered from head to toe in cake, he longed for more rum in the famous movie scene. All he wanted was more rum in the cakes to make the unbearable situation more bearable for himself. And what would the unrivaled Loriot have said with a smile? Perhaps the following:

"Political mud fights are like cake fights. One big ordeal."